When I learned the truth, I felt a despair unlike any other. As the reality sunk in, I fell to my knees. I begged God to take me out of this world.
How could she lay next to me while she was sharing her body with another person?
How would I live knowing that our vows didn’t matter to her?
I wanted to hate her. I wanted to find a way to hurt her back as much as I was hurting. In the end I could not do either of those things.
Why? Hating her wouldn’t undo the hurt. Hating her would have slowly killed me. Hating her would have kept my heart locked in a cage forever.
Instead of hating her, I chose to forgive her. Our marriage ended; my love for her didn’t. It took me many years to go from “being in love” with her to loving her as a “friend” but I do truly love her. As her friend, I’ll always have her back and be there.
My decision may not make sense to others but it makes sense to me. I’m grateful that I didn’t let the hate destroy me.
music.apple.com/us/album/i-wouldve-loved-you-feat-kelly-clarkson/1548854949
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